Welcome to my home on the internet! I’m so glad you’re here. Like most people, I feel weird talking about myself, and for awhile I’ve been at a loss about what to write here. But then I read Deborah Eisenberg’s wonderful short story collection, Twilight of the Superheroes, in which a character named Otto considers the idea that maybe time isn’t linear and maybe we all have these multiple selves floating simultaneously, existing simultaneously, within this crazy infinite universe. This idea made my head explode a little bit, resulting in the the interview below, in which Jessie Ann Foley the teenager interviews Jessie Ann Foley the adult. If you’d like to know a little bit more about me, please read below, or feel free to contact me. I’d love to hear from you!
Teenage Jessie: Hey.
Adult Jessie: Hey.
TJ: So, what’s with the headshot?
AJ: What do you mean?
TJ: The crossed arms. The leather. Are you trying to look like a badass or something?
AJ: Well, that depends. Am I succeeding?
TJ: Not really. You look like someone who’s trying to look like a badass. And that’s not very badass.
AJ: What do you know about being a badass?
TJ: What are you, my mom?
AJ: No, I’m you. Adult you. And to answer your question, yes, I guess I’m trying to look somewhat edgy—like one of the characters in my book. But the real reason why my arms are crossed is because I’m trying to cover up my pregnancy for the photo.
TJ: WAIT. We’re pregnant?????
AJ: No, we were pregnant. Now we’re a mom.
TJ: WE HAD A BABY????? WE GAVE BIRTH???
TJ: Was it so disgusting? Like the video we watched in Honors Bio?
AJ: It was not disgusting. It was amazing. You’ll see.
TJ: That is so cool. Are we married?
TJ: TO JIMMY?????
TJ: UM, JIMMY????!!!! Our boyfriend????
TJ: Oh, him. God, no.
TJ: But we LOVE JIMMY!!!
AJ: We have not loved Jimmy for a long time. Trust me, we found someone much better than Jimmy. It took us awhile, but it was worth the wait.
TJ: Okay, so we wrote a young adult novel?
TJ: But we’re old now! What do we know about being a teenager?
AJ: Well, that’s for our readers to decide. And we may be “old” (even though we’re not that old) but we do know something about teenagers—we’ve been teaching high school for ten years.
TJ: Ew. We’re a high school teacher? This is terrible.
AJ: Thanks a lot.
TJ: It’s just that high school teachers are so. . .nevermind. Couldn’t we have done something cooler?
AJ: Like what?
TJ: I don’t know, like advertising or something.
AJ: We tried that. We weren’t very good at it.
TJ: Or bartending?
AJ: Also tried that. Also not cut out for it.
TJ: Well, at least we became a writer. We’ve wanted that since we were, like, six years old and we read Little House in the Big Woods and we fell in love with books.
AJ: It’s the only dream we’ve ever really stuck with, I guess. That reminds me, we need to buy that book for our daughter.
TJ: Wait, we had a girl?
AJ: Yes, a perfect little girl.
TJ: That is so cool. So, when are we going to have more kids?**
AJ: What are you, my mom?
**quick updated answer to this question: Jessie now has three children…all girls 🙂